Attaining a healthy, well-balanced mindset is crucial to a rewarding lifestyle. But, much too often, anger gets the best of you and forces you to make hasty decisions that would otherwise seem outrageous.
Reacting angrily to infuriating situations is expected. However, if your anger has a strong hold on you, all it takes is a little nudge to cross the line. A paper jam in the printer, your husband’s wandering eye, or loud neighborhood children can all be catalysts to an unnecessary outburst of anger.
The good news is that you can conquer your anger! You can learn alternative measures of stress relief! You can strengthen your relationship with your spouse and children! And you will learn how to free yourself from the all-consuming anger that affects your everyday decisions!
These strategies will help you overcome your anger:
1. Detach from the situation. If you’re in a situation where your blood is beginning to boil, excuse yourself from the room. Grab a bottle of water, get some fresh air, or even call a friend to vent. Allowing yourself a few minutes to strategize an amicable approach to the challenge will enable you to strive for diplomacy.
2. Put yourself in his shoes. Marital arguments can often get out of hand. Before you blurt out a vindictive phrase, think about his feelings. Even seemingly insignificant phrases, such as, “You’re such a momma’s boy,” or “You don’t do anything for this family,” can pack a big punch.
• Seek a solution, not a debate. If he’s a momma’s boy, ask him to focus his attention on you and the kids. If he spends too much time on the golf course, tell him how much you miss your weekly date night.
3. Envision the outcome. Giving your boss a piece of your mind may lead to being terminated. Biting your tongue may pose a challenge, but the security of a weekly paycheck is well worth the effort.
• If your boss is placing unnecessary pressure on you, respectfully ask for more control over your responsibilities by asserting the reasons you’re a trustworthy employee.
4. Ask for assistance. If you’re angry about a printer malfunction or not being able to unfreeze your computer, simply ask for help. Most people like to feel needed and asking for their expertise in a certain area will not only boost their confidence, but will also give you a simple solution to your challenge.
• Examine their approach to the issue and remember the steps so you can remedy the situation in the future.
5. Calmly explain your feelings. Take some time to compose yourself and think about what truly set off the flame. Sometimes, anger is a defensive mechanism to prevent the world from knowing your feelings have been hurt. Remember, it’s perfectly acceptable to be vulnerable. If you feel disrespected or hurt, you deserve to have the issue addressed.
6. Take the high road. Retaliation is a sign of immaturity. If someone has intentionally wronged you, they likely did so in order to squeeze a frantic reaction out of you. Show them that you’re the reasonable party in the situation by being calm, cool, and collected.
7. Laugh it up. When you’re frustrated, your body needs to exert energy. You typically default to exerting negative energy. But, negative reactions add more fuel to the fire. Diffuse the argument by laughing. Laughter allows you to expel energy, while internally easing your frustration as the body recognizes laughter as a sign of joy.
Ultimately, ensuring that your reactions are based on reason, rather than emotion, is the most effective method of coping with anger. Emotionally detaching yourself from the situation at hand allows you to clear the smokescreen of personal resentment and focus on creating an amicable outcome. Remember, anger doesn’t control you – you call the shots!