Listening takes skill and patients, which many people fail to cultivate. To help you see how a good listener responds and how a bad listener behaves we can consider the following. The point of the article is to help you cultivate good listening skills to conquer difficult people, especially those annoying people that just won’t listen.
Description of a bad listener
A person that just won’t listen to you will often interrupt the conversation while you speak. The person has no respect; otherwise, he/she would listen. This is a common problem in society and many of us deal with these types of difficult people. A person that is not listening will also peer down at his/her watch during the conversation. Sometimes this is not true if the person has an appointment to meet, so learn before assuming. A person not listening to you will often focus on self, i.e. he/she will break off the conversation to discuss self. These type of people will show signs through body language, eye signals and the like, letting you know they are bored. A poor listening will also have unaligned posture and will change the topic, or joke around as you talk.
Description of a good listener
A person willing to listen will look you in the eyes as you speak. This person will summarize what he/she is hearing, while asking questions that are relevant to the topic of discussion. The person will use his/her body to let you know attention is focused on your conversation.
As you can see, conclusions are drawn as to who is a good listener and who is a bad listener. The fact is difficult people often have a hard time listening therefore; this is part of your problem. The trick is to make these people listen to what you have to say.
As you move toward dealing with the problem you will need to learn a few details to help you move smoothly along the path. The first step in any difficult problem (I said it once, I will say it a thousand times) is to describe the problem by recognizing what the problem is and why the problem exists in your life.
If you know, what you are dealing with and why you are dealing with it, you have a darn good chance of conquering the difficult person. You will also have a clearly path to follow in finding a resolve. Still, you will need to learn to listen as you move to conquer, simply because if you can’t listen yourself, why should anyone listen to you. You will also need to learn investigation skills, which includes examining evidence, evaluating the problem, searching for facts and so forth. This may not apply in all situations, yet it applies in most situations.
Brainstorming the Problems, Solutions and Ideas
You should brainstorm ideas and consider the consequences of each resolve, as well as expanding on those ideas and renovating other ideas. This will help you have a list of resolves to choose from, and once you have that list, you can scan through the details to see the consequences of each choice.
Once you narrow down the list, you can select the best resolve, listen to your instincts, and move forward to resolving the problem. Use your listening skills as you approach the difficult person so that he/she doesn’t have the option of feeling on the defense line. You should also select your words wisely, since using the best choice of words can sit down the most difficult person nearly every time.