For a brief moment, the world stops when someone close to us dies. It could be a parent, a close friend or a spouse. These are things we don’t want to think about but the fact is, we will all die someday. It is not a matter of how but simply when. Naturally, you are affected but life goes on so you must know how to handle grief.
We hear this often but it is easier said than done and that is to learn to let go of the person. After the person is buried, most of us still cling on to that person and hope that what happened was simply a dream. We will see that person again or they will call us on the phone.
But then reality sets in and letting go begins by packing some of the stuff that both of you once shared. You may even want to give some stuff away. Is this the right thing to do? The answer is yes because life goes on. Chances are, whoever left this world would not want you to sulk and waste your life away.
Handling grief does not mean forgetting about the person. He or she made a mark in your life so remember the good times and cherish it. A great way to do that will be to write this down in a gratitude journal. Try to write at least 5 things every single day and then be thankful for what they contributed. Later, you can look back at it since it helps you deal with the grief.
If you don’t like to write but rather type, you can also write about your experiences in a blog so other people can read it. Your friends and family would surely understand that because it keeps the memory of your loved one alive.
What you write may even touch the hearts of strangers and this might also inspire them to do things that they never thought of before.
Keeping yourself busy is another way to deal with grief. A good way to do that is to work hard in your job or trying something more relaxing like trying out a new sport or hobby. Such activities are known to keep your mind away from what happened even for a short period of time which is more than enough every single day.
For people who can’t handle grief on their own, it is best to join a support group. Those you talk to don’t have to be medical experts. He or she could be a close friend or a leader of an organization. It is much easier to talk with those who have experienced it before rather than talking with someone who is following textbook procedures.
When people you know try to reach out, accept it with open arms because they are the best people to be with during this time of grief.
Do you have a spiritual life? If you don’t now is the time to find it because you can find strength in divine and unseen forces. Some people think this is nonsense while others find solace. Apart from prayer, another way to unit both mind and spirit is to learn yoga or some other form of meditation exercise.
Losing someone makes us vulnerable and if you let this eat you, chances are you will do something stupid. You might try to get into drugs or alcohol as an escape from reality but this does not change anything. The person you cherished so much is dead and nothing you do will ever bring them back.
In a way, you are desecrating their memory and if they were alive today, you can imagine what they would say. The bottom line is, don’t be tempted into doing something you would not normally do.
Handling grief also means letting it out. Cry your heart out, hit something or do whatever you want to release what you feel inside. For guys, don’t be ashamed to cry. It doesn’t make you less of man. It just makes you more human.
The last way to handle grief is to honor your loved one’s memory. You can do so by setting up your own foundation or joining a charitable institution. This just goes to show that even when people reach out, you can do the same for others.